Pelosi, McCarthy, Schumer, McConnell Fantasied Double Date

Mark Goulston
3 min readJul 24, 2022

It seems increasingly clear that unless House and Senate Democrats and Republicans find a way to communicate, cooperate and collaborate that our country is in danger of becoming “a house divided that may not stand…” or at the very least, make significant progress in the service of all Americans.

Recently I had this notion that Pelosi, McCarthy, Schumer, McConnell actually have more in common with each other than they do with their constituents.

They are all elected officials, all need to fund raise and wage successful campaigns so that they can continue to serve in their positions. That is something none of their constituencies need to do. And even though they belong to either the Democratic or Republican party, once elected they serve their entire constituency including those who voted against them.

With that in mind I had a fantasy about the four of them going out together to a private dinner which each of them agreed they would not tell anyone about, even their spouses.

I imagined Speaker Pelosi brokering the idea with the other three, not because she’s the Speaker but because as a woman she may possess slightly less hubris than the three men who are still part of the male gender that won’t ask for directions and who may choke on their pride too much to bare their necks in their manner.

I would see her reaching out to each of them asking and suggesting that the four of them meet for a special, very private and confidential dinner.

At the dinner I would see Speaker Pelosi setting the stage by saying to the others,:

“Going forward, if we’re all re-elected and even if the House or Senate flips, we are going to be called upon to do what’s best for America. I think it’s also clear that the more each of us dig our heels in to espouse our beliefs solely along party lines and vociferously pushing back against each other the less able we, as leaders of Congress, will be able to influence our respective parties to do what’s best for America.

“Here is my suggestion which I am fully open to your rejecting, modifying or responding to in any way that you choose. I will go first with what I hope will serve as a model for communication in hope of our working together more effectively.

“Kevin (McCarthy), going forward what must I always do and what must I stop doing entirely that would cause you to go to bat with your fellow House Republicans for the positions I bring forward, and tell them that you think they should at least consider what I am proposing.

“While you are pondering that I can tell you, if you are willing to listen, what you could do and stop doing that would cause me to go to bat for your positions with House Democrats in a similar fashion. I think we have the possibility of serving as models for how to cooperate and collaborate with each other across the aisle. That might possibly influence others to follow suit out of our colleagues’ being as sick of the divisiveness that serves no one and out of an appreciation for our restoring civility and mutual respect to our discourse.

“Chuck and Mitch, after Kevin and I have this verbal exchange, I would like you to do the same with regard to your relationship in the Senate as you both go forward. In fact, on the off chance that the four of us successfully pull off such constructive communication, I might suggest that we redo in public in full view of the American public.

“BTW none of us are exactly spring chickens and I for one would like part of my legacy to be that I left the Congress more cooperative and less divisive than it has become. Ironically as testimony to how communication has deteriorated, I might even say I would like to leave the Congress as good as I found it when I first started to serve, because we weren’t always so divided.”

Now back to you my readers.

I invite any and all of you to have at me at how utterly naïve, ridiculous and stupid this notion is.

However, if you do that I would respectfully ask you to weigh in with any ideas you have for lessening the divisiveness that is tearing our country apart.



Mark Goulston

Dr. Goulston is the world's #1 listening coach and author of "Just Listen" which became the top book on listening in the world